Look, if you have to chase down a man, it usually means that
he’s got commitment issues and doesn’t actually want to be
caught. Sure, he might be absolutely gorgeous, and he might
even have a wining personality, but you’re chasing him for a
reason.
Any man who actually wants to be with you won’t need to be
hunted down. Instead, they’ll come running towards you with
open arms! And if you think you can change a committment-
phobe into a man who is ready to settle down, you really should
think again.
You become fixated
Chasing a man is not good for your mental health. It can make
you feel anxious, and you start to feel paranoid that every little
thing he says on social media is aimed at you.
You even start analysing all his texts, and you play the “He
Loves, He Loves Me Not” game.
It can be humiliating
Maybe there is one guy you’ve been chasing for a few months
now. You’ve made it obvious everywhere you go that you want
him. You’ve constantly posted links to his Facebook wall,
retweeted all his lame tweets, messaged him, texted him, called
him up, “accidentally” bumped into him and so on.
Everyone knows you’re chasing this guy, from your mom and
closest friends to his Facebook friend’s who have never met you.
For this reason, it’s actually starting to get a bit humiliating now
because he’s clearly not responding. Give up the ghost and find
a man who actually wants you.
You become distracted
When you’re chasing a man, this tends to become the focal
point of your life. It’s pretty stressful and time-consuming, after
all. As such, everything else becomes difficult. It gets hard to
concentrate at work, at home or at school. All other priorities
recede into the distance and your life effectively becomes
temporarily put on hold.
And for what?
You are missing out on other guys
One of the reasons we chase down men is because we’re deeply
attracted to them. But as soon as it becomes clear that the
attraction isn’t what you’d call mutual, it’s important that you
realise when it’s time to call it quits.
Using up all your precious time and energy on just one guy
who’s evading you means that you’re likely missing out on lots of
other top guys who want you. Once you stop chasing a lost
cause, you’re giving yourself a chance to be caught by other men
who are interested in you.
Take yourself out of the race, take a breather and see what else
is out there.
You become jealous
You want this guy and you’ve been spending lots of months
chasing him down. Only, there’s now another girl on the scene
who’s been posting on his Facebook wall quite a lot recently.
You’ve got an enemy (an attractive one) and you’re now jealous
and more distracted than ever before.
Even if you catch him, it doesn’t mean much
Okay, so you’ve finally convince him that you’re worth a shot.
You’ve managed to capture his body and he’s agreed to spend
some time with you. You’ve won. Yay!
Um. Not quite.
See, while you might well have caught his body, it doesn’t mean
that you’ve ensnared his heart. They can be there with you
physically, but their spirit and mind can still be a million miles
away. Although he’s coming out for dinner with you, his mind
might still be on other questions:
“What am I doing here?”
“How do I get out of this?”
“I can’t believe I managed to let her talk me into coming here
tonight.”
It’s important to remember that guys who you have to chase
tend to be free spirits, which means they’re really hard to keep
hold of. Don’t believe for one minute that you’ve won just
because you’re on a date with him.
You’ll feel like a failure
Ultimately, you won’t succeed in your pursuit. As such, you will
likely feel like a failure after all those months of pointless
chasing. He still doesn’t like you – and this can really hurt your
self-esteem.
It’s better to give up as early as possible and move onto a guy
who does appreciate you. Why harm yourself like this? It isn’t
worth it!
He’s probably not a great guy
Great guys don’t require any chasing. They’re totally upfront and
open with you, and they’re always available if you need them.
They don’t go hiding, and they certainly don’t let a lady wear
herself out through hunting him down.
If a good guy wants to be with you, he will tell you. If he doesn’t,
he’ll keep stringing you along to see where this charade is going
to end up.
It’ll be one sided anyway
Even if you do manage to convince him to go out with you, do
you really think it’s going to be anything other than one-sided?
When you want to go out for a romantic dinner tonight, he’ll be
watching football with the boys. When you want him to meet
your parents, he’ll have another excuse. He’s a free spirit who
lives life his way.
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